World's Smallest Handcuffs

Chuckle #469 | October 5th, 2011
 scroll down to leave a comment

Just like marriage and tattoos, inscriptions are forever. So when you’re deciding what tender words or sassy saying to engrave on your wedding band, choose carefully. You’ll be staring at these words for many years to come and you don’t want to regret “My Hubby’s a Hottie!” 15 years from now when your booty starts to sag and he’s got a Hindenburg belly.

Unlike a lot of couples, my husband and I never found the time to get our wedding bands engraved before we got married. Thank goodness. If we HAD, we’d now be stuck with one of those cutesy adorable lovey-dovey sayings that are popular with newlyweds. Now that we know each other better we can inscribe something more meaningful, or dare I say more accurate, on our bands.

But what?

After 20 years of marriage, there are a LOT of things I could say about our love, tolerance and devotion to each other. Not all of them should be etched in gold however.

If we “texted” our inscription, we could fit an entire Shakespearian sonnet on our rings. Romantic right? While this is tempting, I prefer to keep these things short and sweet, like my husband. Here are a few of the options I’ve come up with to honor our 20 years of marriage. Tell me what you think.

1) OMG 20 yrs!
2) I’m His, He’s Mine, then I nearly lost my mind
3) Put me back on or you’ll forget where I am
4) Ex Amore, Tres Vitae
5) World’s Smallest Handcuffs
6) Come live with me and be my love. Marlowe

I can’t decide between something really sappy; something clever and ironic; or something literary. I like Latin because it never fails to make a person sound classy and intelligent. But it can also be cold and austere, and that’s not the ‘love aura’ I’m going for.

Lately I’ve been thinking that it would be nice to choose a line from our wedding song. I understand that this can work well, as long as you weren’t grooving to the Sex Pistols. Our wedding song was Elton John’s Your Song. Very tasteful and innuendo-free.

What do you think of something like this?

How Wonderful Life is… (my ring)
…While You’re in the World. (his ring)

I think this has just the right amount of sappiness without being trite. It would stand the test of time. I would be happy with Elton and Bernie on my ring, but would my husband?

As a baseball fan, my husband might prefer the classic Yogi Berra quote, “it ain’t over till it’s over”. Or how about…

He’s My Grand Slam
She’s My Perfect Game

If only our wedding song had been "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" that would SO work. 

To be honest, this inscription thing is keeping me up at night. Who knew it would be so hard to choose a quote to both represent and commemorate 20 years of marriage? Talk about pressure.

Long ago my husband carved his way into my heart, and yes, he is STILL a hottie!  Maybe that's what I should have etched in gold after all.

-------------------------------------------------------------
Get your Weekly Chuckle via email at http://www.laughoutloudmom.com/
Copyright 2008-2011, LOLmom.com, Greenwich CT, Cathleen Blood